Senior Predictions: Class of 2017

 

Ari Beachey Decides to make their gap year a gap decade and spends it hitchhiking around the world, protesting for the rights of people wherever they go.
Jake Bedwell Sells all of his shoes for charity and becomes a shoeless monk.
Tessa Clark Decides her true interest lies in women’s rugby and quits volleyball to join the National Rugby League.
Megan Duckworth Takes her love of art to the next level by getting a full body tattoo.
Jacob Gonsalves Is mistaken for a Tarsier and gets locked up in a zoo.
Abby Hochstetler Decides pre-med is too difficult and decides to get a job at a flower sanctuary.
Carissa Hostetler Moves to Japan, takes over, and rules as a dictator with her 27 cats.
Simon Hurst Grows his hair out even further, dyes it blonde, and gets a job at Disney as Rapunzel.
Jackson King Is hired to sketch out plans for the remodel of the White House gardens, involving as many trees as possible.
Sarah Leininger Dyes her hair red and stars in the live action version of Brave as Princess Merida.
Byeong Min Lim Opens a sloth sanctuary and hires workers to run it while he naps with the sloths.
Joe Liu Becomes a famous drummer in a death metal band.
Derick Masatu Moves back to Tanzania and opens a giraffe pet store.
Khalid Miller Creates his own trading card game and becomes a billionaire.
Lane Miller Can be found roaming the aisles of Wal-Mart, serenading girls with his saxophone skills.   
Sophie Miller Creates her own TV show and yells at the contestants in a Gordon Ramsey like fashion.
Samantha Minaya Realizes public speaking is all about volume and gets a job yelling GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAALLLLL on televised soccer matches.
Natan Nafziger Moves to Brazil, realizes he actually can’t speak Portuguese.
Brandon Nguyen Writes a best selling book about how rice is life.
Erick Ortiz Makes millions being a radio DJ, but loses it all after investing in bad stocks.
Pamela Ortiz Decides she hates Goshen and everything associated with it and moves to San Francisco, California
Jeremiah Overman Becomes a world famous body builder.
Joel Plank Starts up a business where he gets to test beds by sleeping on them all day.
Daniel Robles Invents a video game which earns him millions, but he spends it all purchasing massive sombreros from gift shops all over the world.
Sofia Thomas Becomes a politician solely to advocate for the legalization of polygamous relationships.
Maggie Wang Takes up a career in makeup and becomes a morgue cosmetologist.
Brooke Weaver Creates a support group called Laughter Anonymous for people who find almost everything funny.
Jiwoo Wi Realizes she hates talking, becomes a recluse, and never leaves her house.
Carissa Woolace Realizes she hates small children, gives up elementary education, and becomes a dietician.
Hannah Yeakey Decides to completely give up being a vegetarian and begins eating a McDonald’s Big Mac for every meal.
CJ Zmudzinski Decides working in a museum isn’t actually that fun and decides to break into them instead to build her own collection.
Zane Zmudzinski Gives up fishing, takes up knitting.

~Carissa Woolace