“It depends on the butt” -Josh W.
“The hydroflask’s a-ringing” -Josiah S.
“Do you have tissues?” -Theo S. “Some people think I have issues” -Brent R.
“Being a mother is a disability, but being a father is a sickness, America, woo!” -Josh
“I would run cross-country if it had a 100m dash.” – Jack V.
“I felt like a moose for a second” -Mariah M.
“God is lactose intolerant.” -Anonymous
“This song is lacking… how do I say it… the mustard and the salt.” -Brody T.
“Milk should be called cow juice.” -Dylan D.
“What’s so bad about the Swastika?” -Lily O.
“You just lose track of time when you’re eating ravioli.” -Anonymous
“I don’t need my hands for tennis.” -Nathan O.
“My four-year-old could bench press Jim (Lyu)” -Josh W.
“I made four dollars… on weed!” -Josh W.
“David has no thoughts” – Hank W.
“At least people aren’t going blind from drinking bathtub moonshine.” -Josh W.
“Dude, you can’t even grow eyebrows.” -Olliver K. to Josiah S. during a discussion of facial hair
“That’s why you gotta stay hydrated, so you can run!” -Genesis M. “That’s why I drank 2 La Croix this morning” -Aaron S.
“BS-ing is an adult skill.” -Josh W.
“I’m into forearms.” -Jacob L.
“That’s called extramarital sex, dear.” -Michael Y.
“Million dollar body, five cent head.” -Bod
“That’s a Brody boo boo” -Brody T.
“A horse is just like the modern day oven.” -Josh W.
“Let’s start with butt stuff.” -Naomi K.
“Who’s Joe Biden?” -Jacob L.
“What’s a thermostat? The thing they put cow semen in?” – Jack H. “Cows don’t have semen.” -Michael Y.
“We’re getting out of PG territory here.” – unknown
“The Northern Lights are something that all humans should see, unlike cockfighting.” – Josh W.
“That’s all I need. Flesh.” -Brody T.
“Damned slut.” -Michael Y. “I SAID VILLAINOUS WHORE.” -Jack H.
“I told my mom that you said you would throat punch me and she said ‘you need to be nicer to Brent.'” – Genesis M.
Josh W. in grandma voice: “Hey sonny, you want a ballot?” In his own voice: “No, give me three.”
“What are Steve’s Jobs?” – Lily O.
“Singing German in the bathroom is one of life’s greatest pleasures. – Brody T.
“They were endangered, now they’re delicious” – Josh W. on bald eagles
“This is a historic place. Shhh, we can’t wake up the ancestors.” – Kelby Y.
“A lot of boomers had a lot to say.” – Josh W. on the Super Bowl Halftime Show
“Is it okay to say cuss words? Cause I might say ‘what the hell is this!'” – Josiah S.
“He got a letter about immigration but he wrote about climate change!” -Jim L. “No, I wrote about immigration.” – Xudong S. “Oh, that makes sense.” – Jim L.
“I may be black, but I’m a black white person.” – Zana M.
“Your ‘S’ should be like petting a floof.” – Brody T.
“What? I have a filter!” – Josiah S. “You have a colander.” – Naomi K.